Living with a dragon.

Once upon a time a woman lived in a castle. This woman was neither extremely beautiful nor was she hideous and grotesque. She was just average. She had black hair but it wasn't so dark that it shone. She was slightly over weight, but as far a medieval society is concerned I suppose she was thin. She was not curvacious and nothing about her screamed supple. Yet, that did not matter because she lived in a castle and it was guarded by a dragon. She knew no knights would come. No one wanted to save a non-princess that was only average in appearance.
So, she spent her days cleaning up after the dragon and tending her small garden. Sometimes when she was feeling adventurous she would escape and see how long it took the dragon to capture her. She knew that it was useless he always captured her, but it was fun none the less since he never hurt her in any way.
It was hard work though, living with a dragon that is. He always left his food lying around. Never cleaned or tidied. His hordes of riches were always dusty. So, she had her work cut out for her.
Well one day while cleaning his riches the dragon was snoring quite loudly. She went to roll him over in order to stop the snoring but mid-turn she slipped and fell. The dragon fell back into place right on top of her head crushing it.
And that is why you must always ensure you wear slip resistance tennis shoes. 'Cause you never know.